


Jade's Lesson

by Nobu



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Multi, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-08
Updated: 2013-04-08
Packaged: 2017-12-07 22:01:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,277
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/753563
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nobu/pseuds/Nobu
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What do you expect would happen when four demi-gods finally met up in person for the first time, after a lifetime of separation?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Jade's Lesson

Jade put the final touches on preparing her apartment for their arrival. Feeding her pet rats, petting the cats, and making sure Bec Noir the black pitbull was comfortable in her bed. It had been a nice day and Jade tuckered the poor puppy out earlier. Which was probably for the best, because Jade didn't want any distractions tonight! She was finally getting to see John, Dave, and Rose, in the flesh!

John was first to enter the apartment. Jade could have sworn his smile brightened up the apartment a little. He was carrying a big package, and shoved it into her hands.

"Hi Jade!" I got you a basket of fruit because I remember how much you like fruit, and I also got you a music CD! You were saying before how your music was getting a bit stale and everything.." He moved past her, and began poking around the apartment. "Oh cool, I have this book too!"

Dave was next. 

"Hey there, coolkid." Jade gave a warm smile.

"Egbert's gifts are characteristically lame, I already updated your iTunes with new music, and there's a link on your desktop to a sneak peek to media that I haven't released yet. Sup Harley." Dave smirked, and gave Jade a pat on the shoulder before going to screw with John. 

Rose was last, and wrapped a scarf around her neck. "I also knitted you some long socks, but those are a bit harder to put on you so I enclosed them in this package. There's also a new tarot card for the deck we got you before. Don't open it until we leave, though."

Jade accepted the package, and gave Rose a hug. "Can you point me to somewhere with an outlet?"

Rose sets up at a nearby coffee table with her laptop, John and Dave jump on the couch, and Jade brings around a bowl of popcorn.

John was bouncy. "Oooh, what are we going to watch??"

"There's this show I want to show you Dave! It's this show about time travelers! I think you and the Doctor would get along!"

"Pfft, as if you're trying to say I wasn't every famous time traveler ever by this point. I haven't just twiddling my thumbs after the session ended, after all. Saving worlds, some tourism, a little bit of film and TV producing. You know how it is." Dave stretched.

"Uh huh Dave. It must be tough being a Knight of Time."

"Yeah man shit sucks"

\------------

With Jade thoroughly engrossed in the episode of Doctor Who, John and Dave communicated across her with glances.

"So, after the episode is over?"

"Yeah. I'll pass you the popcorn bowl. That's your signal."

"Cool. Wow Dave, how do you like Harley's taste in Doctors? Her favorite looks so dorky! And he wears bowties unironically. :)"

"Dude we're still communicating by glances."

"Oh. Sorry." John rolled his eyes.

\-------------

Once the episode ended, Dave saw his opportunity.

"Y'know Doctor Who kind of reminds me of Karkat. And that must make him a douche by association."

She turned to look at him, her eye twitching slightly. "...what was that, Dave?"

"Karkat is a douche, Harley. I don't know how many times I have to tell you, but you should just drop him. Beyond being a huge raging asshole, he doesn't know how to please a girl." Dave stretched out onto the couch, flipping some popcorn into his mouth. 

John chuckled at Dave's comment. "Yeah, I can't imagine what Karkat would be like trying to be romantic. He's tried courting me on a bunch of occassions, but it usually ends up turning into a huge troll fiasco!" John took the popcorn bowl from Dave, and moved over to where Rose was on the sidelines. They exchanged knowing glances. 

Jade fumed. "I already know you like stomping all over my feelings towards Karkat, but I didn't think you'd be a jerk and bring it up after we've finally found each other! Jeez!" She crossed her arms, and turned away from Dave."

Dave went in for the kill. "Karkat is the type that would give you chocolates every Valentine's Day, be your snugglebunny despite his lame protests, and be down for any harebrained scheme you may come up with. That's the Karkat you've been pining over all this time, right?"

Jade's ears perked up at the uncommon admission from Dave. "Well, yeah, I think he's really nice under his layers of aggression and I like that side of him."

"No offense Harley, but doesn't that sound boring as all everloving fuck?" 

"What?"

She turned to look at Dave, to find him on his hands and knees staring into her face. At this distance, his scent flooded her nostrils and made her a little light headed.

"Treating people 'nice'. Is that what you're really looking for? The world is full of Karkats. Rough exterior with a heart of gold. Haven't you been wondering what the other side of the romance spectrum is like?" 

Suddenly, one of Dave's hands shot up to her neck and pushed her head into the couch. The other hand snaked its way down underneath her long skirt. He smirked, and looked directly into Jade's eyes through his shades, but at this distance Jade could see Dave's eyes clearly. And she could recognize something.

She could recognize the gaze of hunger.

"D-Dave! What are you.. please stop.." Her face was beet red at that point, and tears began to stream down her face.

"And if I don't stop? What will you do then, Jade?" He squeezed with both hands, and moved his face closer, so he could feel her hot breath on his face. He smiled, betraying his enjoyment.

"A-Ah... I.. um..." Her head was swimming, and she was panting. 'What was even happening anymore? This is a side of Dave I've never thought could exist..?'

"Shhh. Now is not the time for words." Dave brought his lips into contact with Jade's. At this point, her resistance was all but gone. Dave's tongue explored her mouth as his hands tightened their grip on Jade's neck and crotch. He fingered her shaft.

After a moment that seemed to last forever, Dave broke off the kiss. His hands changed positions. One went to the small of her back and the other to lift his shades, making his stare all the more piercing.

"Jade. First of all, you should know better than to think this was even a huge secret anyway. Internet history is a thing after all. And we're so internet famous by now that a detail like this was pretty easy to stumble upon for people who know how to look. Especially for your dear ecto-brother, sis. That's me. Dave Strider." He ran a hand through her tangled hair. "Nobody important cares about what sort of equipment you have down there."

"Just to ram that point home, I'm going to be the most satisfying lay you've ever had. Think of it as a lesson in 'non-verbal communication'."

Jade's eyes widened.

\-----

"HEY ROS-"

She glared.

"oh, uh.. hey rose." John began again in hushed tones. "how do you think Dave is doing? I can't tell!"

Rose smiled knowingly.

"Oh, I'd say he's doing just fine. I'm going to tease him later about some of his word choices though."

Rose went back to her project on the laptop. John cradled his head in his arms and yawned.

\------------

Jade moaned. Deep down, she understood what Dave was telling her. But the caress of Dave's hand in her nether regions, coupled with the tight wordcraft web he wove, was quickly breaking down mental barriers she didn't even know she had.

She liked jerks. She loved getting it rough. She was a frequent waltzer on the romantic dancefloor, but never experienced someone else in the lead. 

It was less so a trust issue and more that people simply trip over their own feet when they try to interact with her. Her interests were so broad and varied, and her ideas so out there, that people simply didn't know the best way to please her. 

And of course, telling someone what they're supposed to do takes most of the fun out of it. 

Her quivering gaze gained a new spark then, and she wrapped her hand around to grip one of his ass cheeks. "Woof."

"Motherfuck. And here I thought you'd act like a kitten for longer than a minute and a half. I guess you are part-dog, eh?" Dave chuckled, reached over to the end table and grabbed a cigarette from his pack. He smiled.

"Get ready for Round 2."

Jade stole a cigarette from Dave and didn't even ask. 

\--------------

"Hey Rose, how about an assist over here?" Dave called out to Rose, who was still at the endtable on her laptop while being mildly attentive to the festivities on the couch.

Rose nonchalantly opened a tome from her bag, and began reading. "Let's see.. Jade Harley. Various clothing fetishes, and a thing for glasses too. Not that that was ever a surprise to you, Dave. Favored erogenous zones include the ear, armpit, and nipple. Once thought her transgenderism was a terrible secret that she should be ashamed of, but certain events are causing her to come around." Rose smiled, and looked over to Dave and Jade. She wonked. "Need any more assistance, Dave?"

"Yeah wow fuck you Rose you know that's not what I meant."

"I changed my mind. I decided I'd try my own hand at seducing her one of these days, and see if I can't do it better."

Jade's mind boggled. They were all in on this. 

\------

"Hey Dave, does this mean I can join in now?" John crossed his arms in front of the two of them on the couch. 

"Oh c'mon Egbert I only got like two minutes"

"Yeah but you guys are already having cigarettes. I don't think she'll be surprised by any of the rough stuff you want to do to her at this point. Luckily your buddy John Egbert is here to help out a friend!!" He laughed. "C'mon Dave, it's only fair. I have a few surprises of my own after all..." 

"Ok fine.. at least wait until we're done smoking." Dave shook his head.

A devilish grin flickered across John Egbert's face.

For Jade, sexual activities and John Egbert didn't even compute.

\----------

"Wow Jade, having a hot sister is awesome! At least Jade isn't a huge prude like a certain other sister, right Dave?"

Rose snorted. Jade looked up to John not knowing how she should react. "Um.. woof?"

John laughed. "Cute puppy." He reached out a hand to ruffle Jade's hair, before quickly balling his hand into a fist and yanking downward. Jade squeaked and brought her head down, pain shooting through her scalp.  
He gave Jade a pat on the rump. "C'mon Dave! You're the one that wants to be first so badly after all, right? Haha." John grinned.

 

"Here Jade, i'll give you something to do to take your mind off all the lame Strider sex." John pulled Jade's head up to his crotch and unbuttoned his pants with the other hand. It was already hard and throbbing, betraying how much John had enjoyed things thus far. Jade's mind swum from the strong scent emanating from John's dick, and she clasped it in one hand. She stared at it. 

Suddenly, she remembered that Dave was also in the room. She felt a stab of pain riding a wave of pleasure emanating from her behind. She couldn't help but moan, which John took as the perfect opportunity to try choking her to death. He squeezed his grip on Jade's hair harder, and buried her face in his crotch. Her muffled cries were a mix of moan and desperation, punctuated by rhymnic yelps each time Dave thrusted. After a while, Jade got used to the rhythm and she was like butter in their hands. John released his grip on her head just to see how Jade was doing.

She enjoyed it so much, that the three of them stayed in that position for an hour.

\-------------  
SOME TIME LATER...

"Merry Christmas, Harley." Dave kissed Jade's sleeping naked form on the forehead, before moving her to the couch.

"That was a lot of fun actually! Wow Dave, you really know how to push her buttons." John laughed, before moving to the kitchen to rummage through the cabinets for something to snack on.

Rose patted Dave on the head and smiled, a gold flicker in her eye. "Not bad, brother of mine. Hopefully that will make up for the time we spent away from her. She puts on a happy face, but she can't keep her desires from family. Especially family with the sort of skillset that we happen to possess." Rose closed the tome she had been reading from, and put it away in her backpack. "We should probably clean up after ourselves, at least."

"Of course Rose, what kind of person do you take me for jeez. That's practically rule 1 of ectobiological sibling hatesex y'know." Dave adjusted his shades and began his quest to find carpet cleaner. 

Rose leaned down and smiled into Jade's curled-up sleeping visage. "Sweet dreams, sister."

\-------

In another part of town.. it was raining cats and dogs.

Karkat Vantas had just arrived in the city with a box of chocolates, and was currently at a payphone punching in numbers from a scrap of paper labled only as 'Harley'. It went straight to voicemail.

"What. The. Fuck." He fumed.

They said they'd be done with Jade *hours* ago. He groaned. Maybe the box of chocolates isn't enough..


End file.
